Here, folks, is a portrait of my dishwasher.
Not many people can say their dishwashers are outstanding in their field, but
mine certainly is.
This thing mocks me as I drive into work every day. It just sits there in the summer sunshine (ok, it sits in the rain too), and says, "Ha ha! Have fun doing your dishes by hand, sucker!"
And I say, "Thanks Automatic Lazy Ass Dishwasher! Hey, since you're sitting out there, maybe you could tidy up the field a little...looks a little overgrown!"
And then it says, "F**k off!"
And I say, "F**k you too!"
And my day begins.
To see how much I appreciate dishwashers, you can read my ode,
here.